Monday, 27 May 2013

The Knitter of Shipton Street

Me: I am the Knitter of Shipton Street.

Chorus of my friends: And a right good Knitter too!

Me: I am very, very good,
And be it understood,
I create a right good knit.

Chorus of my friends: She's very, very good,
And be it understood,
she creates a right good knit.

Me: I don't use a crochet hook,
And never, never read a knitting book,
(No matter what I overlook).
Though instructions I may,
Occasionally obey,
I never read the whole, whole book.

Chorus of my friends: What, never?

Me: No, never!

Chorus of my friends: Hardly never?

Me: No, Never!

Chorus of my friends: And she never ever reads the whole, whole book!
Then give three cheers, and one sweet treat,
To the inventive Knitter of Shipton Street!

Me: I do my best to satisfy my clients -

Chorus of my friends: And with you they're quite content.

Me: I am exceedingly quick,
I knit a jumper in a week
And my work is often chic!

Chorus of my friends: She's exceedingly quick,
She'll knit a jumper in a week
And her work is often chic!

Me: Though knitting is my life,
It is causing me great strife,
And is a creative drain.
I am never known to fail,
At knitting up a gale,
But, I'll never, never knit again!

Chorus of my friends: What, never?

Me: No, never!

Chorus of my friends: Yeah, whatever!

Me: Well... Hardly ever.

Chorus of my friends: And she'll hardly ever knit again!
Then give three cheers, and one sweet treat,
To the stalwart Knitter of Shipton Street!



Adapted from Gilbert and Sullivan's I am the Captain of the Pinafore